I can’t help but think God sent this song my way one day when I was asking for direction. Still a bit unstable on the ground I was standing with God, while driving home I was reassured – He’s got this. Just continue to love and share that love and he will always be here […]
Journaling
Power of Prayer
Yesterday was bad. Really bad. Kicking walls with rage tears pouring out puffy eyes scared of people bad kind of day. Yesterday was a really bad day after six really good days. Then this morning I woke to what was going to be another bad day then I changed my thinking. Changed my thinking! That’s […]
My 5 Points of Clarity
There is clarity in me today. I will become a stay at home mom. #homemaker That is exactly what I will be – a woman making our home the best it can be for my growing girls and my hardworking husband. I will replace my income with that of savings from me doing the job […]
An Education in Bipolar
I am Bipolar 2 with a social anxiety disorder. This means a series of emotions can rage through me within an hour. I can be on top of the world at 9:05 and by 10:05 I can be balled up crying surrounded by broken dishes and broken relationships. I can be hugging my husband at […]
Beauty Grows In the Darkest Places
About six months ago I realized my mind had changed. My mind – not just my brain – but my mind. I was diagnosed with a mental/mood disorder and my world crumbled. Telling me my brain was not working correctly is like telling a beauty queen they need Botox. My husband always says he married me […]
The Panic Attack
They call it a panic attack. That is such an overused set of words today. You can hear the phrase tossed around in conversation like an upset stomach. Panic attacks are painful. Panic attacks are exhausting. Panic attacks are heart wrenching. Panic attacks evoke a fear within that….the words are not there. The world goes black. […]
Laundry
What is it about this love | hate relationship with laundry? I despise laundry (to the point I often pay someone to do it for me) but there is something about it that makes your subconscious love it. I have a loud mind. It screams often and I want to just escape it. My conscious mind […]
Line in the Dirt
6/9/15 Being diagnosed Bipolar II will bring a blow to you. At first comes denial. It’s impossible for you. You have such a strong mind. It will make you cry. It will make you feel. It’s a line in your life…Drawn straight between before and after the diagnosis. It’s a very deep line. My life will never be the same but is that a bad thing? –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– 9/2/15 […]
The Beginning
12|9|11 Dad’s Cancer Diagnosis 1 year to live I’ve never in my life looked at my dad as weak until today. His mind isn’t weak nor his soul but first time in my life he seemed frail as if the cancer is as bad as they say. Cancer – what a nasty word. One […]