A girl walks into a bar and starts chatting it up with the bartender. She explains she just hasn’t felt herself lately. She’s felt overwhelmed, confused, exhausted, energized, depressed, filled with suffering, angry, grateful, happy….and her list went on. She shared her roller coaster of emotions and recent actions and those around her listened. Her bartender friend suggested she talk to the two women and a man sitting at the end of the bar – one of them would have the answer.
She explained again her feelings of spinning endlessly in a hurricane- watching it all pass by with such anger and hurt.
First the man chimed in. “I believe you have Bipolar Disorder II. You fit all of the criteria to diagnose you. I will go ahead and put that in your medical record to follow you around for the rest of your life. There is a chance you are not because this is our first meeting actually. However you need to start these medicines immediately. “
The girl responds with “I do feel crazy. Oh I’m so happy I have an answer. This life is torture. I will start taking the medicines today.”
“Wait just a minute,” responds the woman dressed in her work attire. “I’m a medical doctor and to me it sounds like your hormones are unbalanced and possibly a nutrition deficiency. I see it in many women your age. With all of the chemicals and rushed lifestyles women are showing signs of menopause earlier in life than ever before. Come in to my office on Monday and we will run some tests and get you on the right hormones, supplements and any other medications you need.”
Lastly, a woman in a white dress and floral scarf spoke. “Sister, none of this is medical. You sound like you are “unraveling” in faith. You’ve lost your faith and the last threads of it are coming undone. Have faith that you will walk back into the light. ”
The girl left confused knowing that this part of her life’s journey was not going to be pretty. She was scared and uncomforted by the words all three had spoken to her. Was she crazy? Was she menopausal in her mid-30’s? Had her belief system finally crumbled ?
I know I can’t be alone in this journey to find my true self again. Many days I feel like the only woman on this journey but surely I’m not. I know I’m not. Recently I have met many more women that have journeyed through this hell. We should not feel we are alone or judged if we share. Those that judge….not the women we want to surround ourselves with.
So this is not a blog about cute Pinterest mom activities or my neighbor Mary Jane. It’s not an edited version of life to make you feel worse about yours. This is about many facets of the female experience. It’s about hormones that once allowed us to give life now have us questioning life. It’s about neurotransmitters that we don’t understand and it’s about the messiness of life making us feel CRAZY. It’s going to be real. It’sgoing to be funny. It’s going to make you cry. It’s going to make you smile. It’s going to cause me to loose friends but gain real
women in the making. But hopefully it’s going to help you and others in this journey we are ultimately on together.